Wednesday, April 06, 2011

Settling in to my unique self

I've always felt this sense of isolation. Like I just don't it in. A little different. A little weird. I've really tried to fit in over the years in my various groups of peers. Church groups, school friends, family, work friends and other various affiliation groups.

The desire to be liked and accepted has often led me to adjust my personality, my values, the way i dress, my ideals and other things that make me, me. I've often lived in this place all the while knowing i wasn't be authentic. It felt... gross. But I just wanted to be accepted.

My life journey has finally led me to a place of acceptance. However, this acceptance looks very different than I always dreamt it would. It has nothing to do with other people and everything to do with me.

I have begun to accept myself. I have accepted the idea that I will never completely fit in with a particular group. And that's ok. I don't want to loose my unique identity. Myself. I was created this way.

I am fearfully and wonderfully made! And it's the only way I want to be.

7 comments:

Ted said...

hell yeah!

The Elam's said...

I think you are pretty awesome!

joyce harback said...

Thanks for your post. We are years apart in age but I feel like you are writing parts of my life. I just read a great book about this: Brene Brown's "The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You Should Be and Embrace Who You Are" It's good reading!

Kari said...

Jamie- Thanks! You are too. :)

Joyce- Thank you for sharing. I will check out that book. Sounds interesting!

Mere said...

Love this! I can relate to alot of what you are writing. Thanks for putting it out there and being you. :)

Anonymous said...

Thanks for your honesty. I sit here and read your posts and think "is she talking about me". Sounds so familiar. You are beautiful inside and out. Love Ya!!


Jane

Kari said...

Mere- Thank you!

Jane- We need to catch up and share stories! :)